CRAP LECH

"My name's PJ and I'm your server
for the day". The tourist's fervour -
An uprising, doey eyed, in love old timey.
Four eyes is wrong, his lust unripe
His cheese is strong, the slow and stupid type
But cleavage at twelve o'clock and he's untimely

He's a crap lech

In corduroy the demi peeping tom
more teddy boy than femidom
an aspiring middle class poodle haired rocker.
The married flirt in drink is torn
the extrovert who has to hide his porn
"Well is beauty as just a friend such a shocker?"
"OK, I like her even though she's got her knockers"

He's a crap lech

The incontinent on amphetamine
takes a fantasy breaks in Thailand or Tallin
he's a red bloodied male but he don't rub it in
patronising charm surfs all over her skin

The pass is mental, ken? More brawn than rocket
He adjusts his Gentlemen's Friend through his pocket
bold as brass, mucky tongued dad at a disco
shakes his horn of plenty at youth's amber glow

He's a crap lech

by Robert Lloyd, copyright control